Helpfull Tips

[mel hubbard]

Dont waste money buying expensive binoculars,,, simply stand next to the object you wish to veiw. High blood pressure sufferers,,, simply cut yourself and bleed for a while, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers turned to 'fast wipe' whenever you leave your car parked illegally. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep. Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books,,,, simply cross out the names of people you dont know. Clumsy??? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. Anorexics,,, when your Knees become fatter than your legs,, start eating cakes. olympic athletes,,, disguise the fact you've taken steroids by running a little slower. AND FINALLY,, An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator. Dont buy expensive 'ribbed' condoms,,, just buy ordinary ones and slip a handfull of frozen peas inside before you put it on. Never let it be said that i dont help you guys out

[Mvovr]

I will never look at a pea the same again. :laugh1: